Introduction:
"Finally,
someone...who understands..."
Sun Sep
2, 2001
Rich had
a braking and entering charge at 10 or 11 yrs old: one first degree felony and
two second degree felonies. He plead no contest and the Judge found him guilty
because I testified against him.
The
prosecutor said a lot of parents get before the Judge and take back everything
they say about their kid which results in the Judge not being able to do
anything. The prosecution always stressed to me that I don't change my mind
because that's how things get thrown out of court. I told them they didn't have
to worry about me because I was going to testify.
Then, as
far as placement, there are several different places for kids to go. I kept
demanding and requesting boot camp. I would bring up bad things that I have
heard about other places and tell them no, I didn't want him to go anywhere but
boot camp. The Judge didn't think Rich was a candidate for boot camp but the
case managers did. They were talking about placing him in Avon Park and I said
forget it. I want him in boot camp, that that's what my child needs. But all of
this didn't happen over night either.
I have
been fighting the court system and cops in our district for four years trying to
get help. If it wasn't for the gun that I saw, Rich would still being doing
whatever he wanted right now. Also, anything he did wrong, I was constantly
calling the cops and getting case numbers, documenting everything I have done,
what Rich did, etc. But this whole battle took four years. They want you to go
through counseling which last a year, then follow ups to that, then placement in
shelters. If need be, you have your child “Baker Acted” just to keep him safe
and just keep documenting everything: times, dates, situations, what they would
say to you (cussing, etc.).
For
example, anything you can get on video of you child…do so. I would video Rich in
front of the house making drug deals. I would put the camera between the blinds
and start recording. Recording phone calls doesn't hold up but videos do.
Also, if
a child has a public defender, watch out! The public defender will twist
everything around to make it look like the parent is to blame. I about had a fit
when I heard the PD telling the Judge that I was a mean mother and how Rich's
life would be different if he didn't have to deal with that, etc. Oh, yea. I was
ready to go up and deck that lady! Thank GOD the cops got up to the stand and
told the Judge, as I had, that I was not mean; I was upset because my child had
a gun and was scared for his safety and everyone else's. Plus, we have a very
nice clean big house and live pretty well. I couldn't believe what that lady
said about me when she had never really even talked to me! But her job is to get
people off. Then she tried to get Rich released to come home until placement was
found and thank GOD the Judge had enough sense to tell her off which made me
extremely happy.
He put her down
right in front of everyone and told her “Do you know what these parents would
have to go through in the mean time? No, Richard is to be placed in JDC
immediately. And that's all I want to hear from you! if you have anything
further to discuss Ms.--- then we can discuss it in my chambers. Do you
understand!” I was like…alright Judge Ramsburger! Finally, someone on my side
who understands what I have been going through and putting up with for the past
four years! It was like the Judge was reading my mind or was living with us for
these past years. He was wonderful!
top |
my word!
"...I pictured myself in Rich's
shoes..."
Thu Jul
19, 2001
Well I
had to call the boot camp place this morning at 9am to see if they transferred
Rich yet…Big mistake on my part because that's when reality hit. The guy on the
phone was very military sounding (loud voice, firm, scary). So I told him who I
was and wanted to see if Rich was there and he said yes, and he was treating
this as the official call to let me know (even though I called them) that Rich
arrived and was going through the process as we spoke. I asked if I would hear
from anyone regarding how everything is going and he said they send progress
reports in the mail and then I need to return a sheet after I am done reviewing
it (signed, saying I received it and read it) and that they want it back
promptly…well as soon as he said that and the way he said it…I thought I was in
boot camp…I was like…I will put it in the mail the next day…and he says
“good…that's what we like to hear” (in this loud, firm, scary military voice)
and I said ok…good bye…I got so nervous I was ready to say “Yes…Sir…” It was
like just hearing him talk was enough to scare the crap out of me. And address
them appropriately even though I wasn't the one in boot camp…It was like a
natural reaction that you just want to say "yes, sir…” Then the tears started
because I pictured myself in Rich's shoes and how scared I felt and I was just
on the phone with the guy. My day then turned into depression and getting teary
eyed the rest of the day and can't snap out of it. I think of what they are
probably doing with him and it is upsetting me now because it is real. But then
I try to think…ok…this is what he needs…ok…yea…but what if they push him to the
limit and he dies or something…ok…they won't let that happen…ok…it will be ok…my
mind is going a mile a minute…plus being away from home, not having your mom
there to talk to, or being able to call home…aahhhh…
top |
my word!
"...we want parents to be concerned..."
Mon Jul 23, 2001
Called
the boot camp today to see if I could at least find out how Rich was doing.
Spoke with Mr. Vines, Case Manager, and he said Rich was doing good. I said,
really. And he said, as long as he controls that attitude he does good. That it
was difficult at first but they expect that with all the kids and he is learning
the attitude doesn't work here. And he also saw him out there today doing push
ups and running, he was doing good. I said, good. I have been worried and
wondering how he is. Mr. Vines, said…that's good…we want parents to be
concerned, to call, and be involved. He said to call as much as I wanted. I
said…don't tell me that because you'll be telling your secretary to tell me that
you don't work there anymore...(he laughed)...Then he said…so I need to leave my
recorder on…I said…Yea! (we laughed)…then I asked him if he was allowed to tell
him anything for me and he said yea…So I said…tell him I love him and that he
can do it…Then Mr. Vines…said…do you want me to give him a big kiss to…and I
said…ah…would ya…(we laughed)…he said…not in this life time…I said…oh, come on,
a big guy like you...go ahead…and he said…nope…it's not happening…(we
laughed)…Anyway, he ends up calling me later to [let me] know about the progress
meeting they have every other Tuesday then when we were hanging up he says...oh,
by the way…I gave him the message…but I didn't kiss him…(We laughed…) I
said…that's ok…I'll give him a big one when I see him…he said ok… So that broke
the ice for me knowing that he is doing ok…let alone that someone there had a
sense of humor about them…so that was nice as well…
top |
my word!
"This place is going to do me
some good."
Tue Jul
31, 2001
I
received a post card from Rich today…I will write it the exact way he did and
the spelling, so it isn't me in case you are wondering.
"Hey Mom
how are you doing. Im doing good staying out of trubble. Sorry it took so long
to write, but I had a lot of studing to do. So I can Get to see you. Tell Nana's
and dad I love them, yes I Love you to. Thank's for writing me all that time,
tell nana thank's to. I am geting a littel bit bigger buy the day. Sorry for how
I was at JDC. This place is going to do me some good. Tell T.K. I said hi and
for him to stay out of trouble. Tell nana's that I will write them when I can.
Yes I want you and nana's to send me some pictures. I have to go not realy. but
I am running out of room.
P.S. I
Love you so so much yes and dad. Tell Nana's that to. Write Back Love You"
top |
my word!
"...Rich's behavior is outstanding!"
Tue, Jul
31, 2001
Mr.
Szebo from boot camp called me today at work. What a nice man he is. He was
letting me know that they haven't been giving Rich is Prozac because they don't
like kids on anything in boot camp and that they even asked Rich if he felt ok
off of it and he said yea. And he said that the problem with boys is that they
seem to get home sick quick. Rich was home sick and also told Mr. Szebo that he
missed his mom (ME)…Also, that Rich's behavior is outstanding!
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my word!
"I write you every
day..."
Mon Aug 6, 2001
Well I had a meeting at the boot camp
today regarding Rich's schooling, the options he has as far as graduating or
getting a GED or a special diploma. Anyway…I will skip all that and get to me
seeing him for the first time.
He walked into the
room in his military wear, stood with his arms and hands as straight as they
could be along the side of him, looked up and straight ahead, didn't blink an
eye. Then the lady [proceeded with introductions] as he still stood up and put
her hand out to shake his and this is what he had to say: 'Sir, Recruit
requesting to shake Ms. Wilten's hand, Sir!' It was OK, he did…then he said
'Sir, Recruit requesting to sit down, Sir!' which was OK…then to speak he always
had to say 'Sir, Recruit would like permission to speak, Sir!' 'Sir, Recruit
(then would say what he wanted and end it with) Sir!' Forgot to tell you when he
first sat down he looked at me, I looked at him, he smiled, I smiled, then both
of [us] started crying at the same time. Then that happened a couple of times.
He requested to tell me things and they let him…Then at the end…Rich, being who
he is, looked at the case manager and said 'Sir, Recruit requesting to spend 5
minutes with his mother, Sir!' The man then said, 'Richard, you'll try anything
won't you (laughing)?' Rich says 'Sir, Recruit tried…Doesn't hurt to try, Sir!'
and we all laughed including Rich…He was able to tell me he received a 'B' on
his spelling test which he was happy about and one thing that happened with the
platoon and the punishment they got…(We were all laughing). Then it was time to
leave and they said I could hug him. So I grabbed him…kissed him…kissed him…and
kissed him…hugged him…told him I love him…he cried…he turned and gave me a big,
big hug…again and I told him I would write him and he said 'You wrote me again'
and I said, 'I write you every day'…he turned hugged me…I kissed him…and off he
went…His poor little eyes were all watery when I was leaving…it killed me…But he
looked good, was in good spirits considering, was smiling, laughing and talked
very positive…It was better than any visit I had with him while he was in JDC,
I'll tell you that much…But it wasn't a visitation and they told him that…plus
that he had to earn me coming to see him in two weeks…and to go home at
Christmas one of his goals is to do good in school so he can come home at that
time…I don't know for how long…it might and probably is just for the day…
top |
my word!
"DIs there
handled it real well"
Wed Aug 15, 2001
Hi mom, how are you
doing. I'm doing just fine, how is work going for you. A day or two ago one of
the kids hit a DI [Drill Instructor] in his face, but the two DI's there handled
it real well. Now the kids is over at the real jail. He is facing up to 12 in a
half years of hard time. He only had 15 days left. If you hit a DI its a minimum
of 5 years. It was crazy we all got to see the first part of it. We were at
lunch when it happened. I can't wait till Saturday so I can see you. I have a
test on Monday to see if I get my blue cover. I've been studying real hard on it
so I think I am going to pass. I love you and tell Dad and everyone else too.
So, that's how my week has been. Write me and tell me how you've been........
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my word!
"It would be nice if
dad came with you to see me."
Fri Aug 17, 2001
Hello. I loved being
able to see you today. That was real nice of him to let me give you a hug. It
made my day so much better! It really stinks that I can't see you on Saturday.
But I will pass the test next time. And yes I got all of the letters you have
sent. I have a stack of them sitting in my footlocker. And the pictures taped on
the lead of it so I can look at them every time I go in my room when they let
you. It would be nice if dad came with you to see me when they let you. Like I
said I have dropped everything between us. I hope he can do the same. Tell
nana's I said good bye and have a good time. Will you be at the next treatment
team meeting? I hope so. Tell Aunt Dawn I will write soon. I love you. Write
back. Tell everyone I love them. I will write soon.......
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my word!
"I'll
never be able to see you...Mom"
Fri Aug 17, 2001
Then today, Friday
about 2pm, I received a phone call from the boot camp drill [sergeant]. He
told me Rich was going to talk to me for one minute. Rich got on the phone and
was balling his eyes out, crying so hard. Said he couldn't have visitation and I
said, ever? He said no, this Saturday. I said we know that honey. What's
wrong...Mom, I can't pass that test, it's too hard. I'm stupid mom, I'll never
pass it, I'll never be able to see you.. Mom, I love you so much....Where's
dad.. I told him he was mowing the lawn. He said. tell dad I love him....I said
ok, he loves you too..(He is still crying very bad) I said, honey you can do it,
I got [your] letter and you said you could. no mom, I can't it's too hard.....we
have to remember all this stuff, I can't do it mom.....(He had to hang up) Mom,
I love you...Rich.. I love you too, honey. it will be ok...I'll write you
tonight...He said.. ok..(crying hysterically) and hung up...Because the drill
[sergeant] was in the back ground yelling...GET OFF THE PHONE NOW!
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my word!
"Well he PASSED!"
Tue Aug 28, 2001
Well he PASSED!
Thank God! So we will be able to see him this Saturday and Sunday from 12-1:00.
I can't wait! They said he has been doing good. He hasn't had any referrals of
any kind. He has been following the rules very well. He came to give me a hug
and said that my letters was the only thing that is getting him through this (he
was crying) and gave me a big hug. His dad stood up and he gave his dad a big
hug as well and his dad told him he'll do good. His dad then told the boot camps
guys that he was impressed and that they were doing a good job and to keep up
the good work. Then when I got home I had two cards from Rich. He stated that he
was going to pass the test this time and when he did then he would be able to
sit down to eat, have salt and pepper, and a chair in his room. He also said
that he was thinking about me and his dad, and FOOD! :)
top |
my word!
"Then you hear the drill
sergeant yell..."
Sat Sep
1, 2001
Went and
saw Rich today. We went into one of the school rooms, sat at tables and waited
for the kids to come in. It is the same set up as JDC where they have to sit
across from you. Then you hear the drill sergeant yell for them and them
responding, then there they come. They stand at the table until they are told to
sit. Rich was in good spirits. Smiling, laughing and telling us about boot camp.
There is the sand pit story. When it is used as punishment. They have to roll
around in this big sand box then they are told to sleep with the SANDMAN!
Meaning you don't shower, you stay like that all day and go to bed with sand all
over you. (It was funny they way he was telling it, we were all laughing). Then
another sergeant calls it his
SUGAR
COOKIE. Then there is the electric chair. They go up against a wall with their
back against it, they bend their legs (as if it was a chair), put their arms out
in front of them and stay like that for however long. He gets up at 5am, makes
his bed and the corners have to be folded correctly, the yelling starts, off to
breakfast they go. They stand up eating until they earn their blue cap. They
hold their plate in their hand while eating and they have 5 minutes to eat! Then
it's outside until about 8am then school from 9 - 2, then counseling, tutoring,
dinner, bed. Rich also earned a door on his room. They have no privacy or doors
until they earn it. They all go to the bathroom together and showers. There are
12 kids in his platoon. They wear flip flops in the shower because the floor is
slippery. They call them sliders. Then their tennis shoes are called something
else, can't remember. He said when they first arrived it was scary. They were on
the bus and transported to boot camp. Handcuffed and feet cuffs. The driver told
them just respond with Sir first and end everything with Sir and you'll do fine.
So they take the kids to this room, they are given their uniforms, they change,
then they go into the hall and about 20 DI's jump them, yelling at them, pushing
them up against the wall, then a whistle blows and they stop (Rich said the kids
were like, oh, good it's over with) then the whistle blew again and they started
yelling and pushing again. This went on for awhile, then they made them do push
ups right away and he said they would even put their hands on their backs to
make it harder for them. (He was smiling while he is saying this, he wasn't
angry) Also, you are not allowed to look at the DI's. You have to stare straight
ahead or stare right through them. Then he was telling us some things he had to
do when he got in trouble. We laughed because some of this stuff was really
funny. And even Rich said, some of the drill sergeants are funny and they do it
on purpose to see if your laugh and you aren't suppose to but sometimes you do
and you get in trouble. He had to keep walking around putting his fingers on
each side of his mouth (making a smile) and say "cheese." Then if they would
forget something, they'd have to walk around hit them selves in the head (like
when you forget something) and say "I can't believe I forgot my..." He said the
food wasn't that bad. But he is craving Checkers...I was like...Checkers...how
about a big lobster and steak...and he was like...Nope...Checkers....that's what
the other kids were wanting as well. Weird...I'd go for the lobster and steak.
So actually, I think boot camp is the perfect place for trouble kids heading
down the wrong path. They learn discipline, respect for themselves, others and
property. Now they will see how good they had it at home compared to having to
ask for permission all the time and addressing parents as "Sir… Sir!," or "Mam…
Mam!" and how they take a lot of things for granted. I think this is a wake up
call and hopefully they will retain what they have learned and earned. That they
will come out a different and better person. The boot camp focuses a lot on
family and education. They are very nice people and seem to want what is best
for the kids. They aren't mean like we think from TV or whatever. They are
military structure and doing a great job as far as I'm concerned.
top |
my word!
"...they can't believe the
difference..."
Sun Sep
2, 2001
Went and
saw Rich today (Sunday) with mom and nana. He was in all of his military uniform
today, right down to his shiny boots that he says he spit shines. He was crying
as soon as he saw them and then we all started. We had an excellent visit. Mom
and nana, thought he looked real good. Then it was time to leave and the boot
camp guy yelled "Jr recruits you have 2 minutes" you would have thought someone
shot off a gun the way mom just about jumped out of her seat. I was laughing so
hard…I also heard two other mom's state that they can't believe the difference
in their sons in just a month and a half. That there is such a big difference
already. That it was amazing. Then one of the ladies’ 10 year old son said that
he wanted to go there so he can get into shape. It was funny. Get into shape.
No…stay out of trouble and do what you are told and work out at a gym…LOL
top |
my word!
"I am so excited!"
Wed Sep
5, 2001
Rich
called this evening. He had a 15 minute phone call. Anyway, he took the hardest
test yet which is the drill ceremony test. He PASSED. Let alone did he pass, he
was the only one who score 100%! He also took a flag test and was one of 3 that
passed and is now raising and lowering the flag every day. I am so excited!
top |
my word!
"I think this is the
most wonderful program..."
Wed Sep 12, 2001
Rich advanced to
his next level which is level three. Everyone praised Rich and how good he was
doing. They had nothing bad to say about him. The one counselor said she wanted
to make a statement to me and Rich because what he has done no one else has ever
done and she just thought it was wonderful. When she would call him in for
counseling he would address her military style (as they all do) then she would
ask him how his day was going....Well Rich is the only one in her history at the
boot camp to answer then ask her how her day was going and how she was doing and
she just thought that was unusual and that no one has ever asked her that. So
she was happy. Then one of the teachers said that she had her reservations about
him but he showed her wrong and has made her very proud to have him there and
that he has been doing wonderful and has impressed her in his school work. So
see.....they do get on them when they do bad.....but they also recognize and
praise them when they do well. I think this is the most wonderful program
provided to troubled kids. The people there seem to really care, love their
jobs, and are there to help the kids.
top |
my word!
Him and his dad got along good.
Sat Sep 15, 2001
We had our first two hour visit today
with Rich. His dad went for the whole two hours which was a shock. We had a very
good time. Him and his dad got along good. Rich was in good spirits, let alone
very happy with his grades. He hasn't had to visit the sandman lately. LOL He is
now on food duty and distributes the food along with two other kids. The food is
prepared at the County Jail and brought over to the boot camp. I don't think I
would want inmates making my food but you have to do what you have to do.
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my word!
"...An Honor
Roll Student At Pinellas County Boot Camp."
Sat Sep 15, 2001
Rich's latest report card, first month
American Government: 91%, A
Integrated Science: 92%, A
PCSD: 100%, A
English/Spelling: 78%, C
Math: A
His dad said he will get a bumper
sticker after all. But instead of Pinellas County Jail it would say "My Child
Was An Honor Roll Student At Pinellas County Boot Camp." LOL
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my word!
"This is the kid I want!"
Thu Sep 20, 2001
Rich called tonight
in a great mood. He is on the honor roll at this point in the grading period. He
stated that he really likes it there and doesn't want to leave. That he likes
the responsibility and structure that they are providing. That he is even
considering checking into the military or something but he said they wouldn't
take him because he is a convicted felon with a fire weapon (that's why he is
probably saying that he would join, knowing that he can't, if that is true.)
LOL. He said the Jrs. came in the other day and it is so funny watching them
like the seniors watched them when they came in. All I know is that this isn't
my kid. LOL But I do love him and what is taking place. This is the kid I want!
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my word!
"He is doing wonderful."
Sat Oct 6, 2001
Sorry I haven't
been in touch in a while. Several things going on in my life: My bird became
very ill; working late; and I ended up sick. Always managed to go see Rich
though. He is doing wonderful. He has this big medal he has been wearing around
his neck which he won for best sportsmanship award, also has his picture put up
in the room we have visitation at for this. He is also second in command in his
platoon. He also has his picture up for DNC award. He is the only kid that has
two pictures up. Only Rich and 3 other kids are in pictures. His is on the honor
roll. He is doing excellent. Every visitation is wonderful. He has passed all
levels and is now a green hat. The next level is level 4 which is a gold hat. I
will find out if he advances to level 4 on Tuesday. I know he will. Then the
count down begins until Family Day! Which Rich can't wait for. This is when he
will advance to transition as well. But Family Day is a 2 hours long. This kids
will perform the Drill n Ceremony, show us around the facility and EAT! EAT what
they want. Rich has been craving a Spicy Chicken sandwich for weeks now. He has
basically given us a list of food to bring. I would be craving a steak or
lobster, I even offered this and he still wants the Spicy Chicken sandwich.
Unbelievable.
LOL Getting ready
to go for a visit now. Will keep you posted.
top |
my word!
"He is now a Gold hat..."
Wed Oct 10, 2001
Just wanted
everyone to know that I went to the treatment team meeting on Tuesday and Rich
has been advanced again to the next level. He is now a Gold hat which is the
highest level at the boot camp. He is second in command of his platoon and has
earned several awards for his behavior; education; most improved; sportsmanship;
DNC; etc. Even the toughest DI who is in operation of the boot camp even praised
Rich on his performance, etc. He also made the A/B honor roll. The DI even told
Rich that he is extremely upset with his platoon and that his platoon is the
worse platoon he has ever had to deal with and that most of them have not
advanced to where they should be. But also told Rich to remain focused, that he
was not stating that Rich is the problem and that Rich needed to KEEP setting an
example for his platoon. :) Family day is approaching fast!
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my word!
"...they are getting back a
better kid..."
Thu Nov
22, 2001
Well
here is the update since Rich's transfer ceremony. The transfer ceremony was the
most beautiful event I have ever seen. Rich's father was even impressed with
Rich and that is in event in itself. Even the DI's would come up to our table
and sit down and talk to us and tell us how hard, and wonderful Rich has been.
The accomplishments he made, and how they feel he will be one of the success
stories. That meant alot and his father couldn't believe the things these DI's
were saying. He was impressed to say the least. Since this time, his dad has a
whole different outlook toward Rich. Instead of saying all these negative,
belittling (sp) things about his son, now he praises him and I never thought I
would see that happen. Rich is now in transition and he likes it as well.
Although he has stated he missed boot camp. In transition they have basically
the same set up except instead of DI's in their face 24/7 and yelling, they are
more relaxed. They let the kids make their own decisions and face the
consequences thereafter, if any. The individuals that work in transition are
just as wonderful as the people in the boot camp facility.
I went
to Rich's first treatment team meeting Wednesday since he has been transferred
to transition. Everyone had all good things to say, nothing negative, he's on
the honor roll once again, he had no red marks to where other kids do, he
started his substance abuse program. They told him to keep up the good work,
they praised him alot in the things he has accomplished. They have the boys fill
out this sheet of paper which is a progress sheet/goal sheet about themselves.
There are four different sections and each section has four lines for the youth
to write something down. Well the Corporal was impressed that Rich filled out
every single line on that page because he said he was thinking about what he was
writing therefore it showed he was really into the questions. Then the Corporal
said "and if you don't have enough room, you turn it over". He turned Rich's
paper over and the whole back of the page was written on. We all laughed and the
Corporal then told Rich...."Son, this is what I like to see. This shows me that
you took an interest in yourself, the problems you had, what you are struggling
with now, and your future goals. This son, showed me that you wrote this from
your heart! And that's what I like! You showed this from your heart son! That's
good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then the Corporal said "we want you to do good because when
you get out of here we want your parents to have back that good kid they once
had, not the one that ended up in here, do you understand that! Rich replied
"Yes, Sir, but they are getting back a better kid this time." I thought I was
going to cry my eyes out. Because that is the child I gave birth to!
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my word!
"It's been a long road..."
Fri Dec.
7, 2001
Went to
another treatment team meeting on Tuesday. Everything went great and they
couldn't say enough good things to Rich and about how well he is doing. His
first home visit is next weekend! Can't wait......... He will come home December
16th from 12 noon to 8pm. We have to pick him up and return him as well. Then he
will come home 12/22, and 12/25 for 8 hours. January home visits will be 1/1,
1/5, 1/12, 1/19, 1/26. February is 2/2, 2/9 which all of these are 8 hour
visits. February 12th and 17th is a 24 hour pass as well as 2/23 and 2/24. The
48 hour home visits start March 1st - 3rd, March 8th - 10th, March 15th-17th and
March 22nd - 24th. I thought he was suppose to be release on aftercare March
17th so I will have to check into that. But never the less, I can't wait. It's
been a long road but worth it every step of the way!
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my word!
Reflection
Sun Dec.
16, 2001
This is
something the boot camp had all the kids do. It is a story about their life
prior to boot camp, arrival at boot camp, boot camp, and other issues. I think
people would like to read his story. It will bring tears to everyone's eyes,
especially at the end. --- KW
Reflection
Before I
came to boot camp I spent my days sleeping and doing nothing. I would sleep most
of the day and get up and come out around the time the sun was going down. But
even if I got up at
noon
all I would do is sit around and smoke weed or get drunk. I don’t really know
why I never came out in the sun, I guess I just hated the sun. Like I was
saying, most of the day I would get high or drunk and just sit around playing
video games or just watch a movie or some television. It’s not like I would
never go out in the sun, I just hated walking around doing nothing. When I did
go out, I would go out and go to the beach and ride my friend’s waverunner. What
me and my friend T.K. like to do the most of all is a game called laser tag.
When nighttime came that is when it would get crazy. We would go to parties and
do drugs, mess around with women. The most common thing to happen is one of my
friends would end up getting into a fight. But see I am the type of person that
does not fight unless I have to. When my friends would get into a fight about
something stupid, I would just sit back and watch the fight until another person
tried to jump in and fight my friend. That’s when I felt like I had to fight.
Sometimes it would stop it and the fight would end. But there is always the
times when it does not end like that. It turns into a big group fight then that
would lead to the cops coming. Everyone there would take off running from the
cops and that would start a big thing. The cops would bring out the dogs on us.
That didn’t happen every day but I happened a lot. Before I came to boot camp I
thought of boot camp the same way as the kids do. I thought I would come in and
tell you what I thought of boot camp. I guess we can start right about the time
I found out that I was going to boot camp. I found out that I was being put into
a boot camp about three days before intake day. I was trying to think of a way
to get out of it and none of them worked. So then I was trying to get myself in
a better mood about being put into boot camp by thinking that they are nothing
and all it is going to do for me is make me big and fast. That helped for the
first day but none of the other days. So then it hit me right on top of my head.
I was not going to make it through boot camp! While I was in JDC, I had a best
friend that was locked up with me. He had already been through boot camp and he
kept on telling me it was nothing and that I would make it. Then I was thinking
I will make it and it will be a piece of cake. Then the day came. I was woke up
at 7:00am
and that is when I started to feel scared and when you get scared you don’t
think right. I was thinking that if I pop my knee out, I can get out of going to
boot camp. Then the time came for us to go and that is when my head was
somewhere else. I was thinking about hitting one of the DI’s right in his face
and then they would kick me out of there. Then I came back to reality and I knew
I was stuck. That is when I started to think about my family and friends. But
mostly about what I have done to my family. The whole time I was just thinking
why did I do what I did to get put in this type of place.
I arrive
at boot camp on July 19, 2001, the day of intake, it was a day I will never
forget for the rest of my life! They brought some other recruits and me into an
office and at that time I was feeling like life couldn’t get any worse. After
they were done taking all of our information and pictures they brought us to a
room. This room said intake right next to the door. When we entered the room a
whole lot of DI’s started yelling at us and telling us to dress down into an
outfit of theirs. At this time I was feeling a lot of different ways. The
biggest feeling in my body at the time was that I was scared. I felt like giving
up! Then they put their hands on us and they were getting into our faces! When
that was taking place I started to feel real angry and sad at the same time. It
was a weird feeling. It started to calm down a little bit when they had us
sitting there and telling us what was expected of us during our stay at the boot
camp. At this time, I was feeling that all the bad stuff was over with. After
they talked to us they told us that we were going to get ready for lunch and
they also asked all of us if we wanted to have some ice cream. Now I was feeling
a little happy. But I should have known that boot camp was not going to give us
ice cream! When they opened the door I looked deep down into the long hallway
and that is when I lost any of the happiness that I had. As we walked into the
hallway a bunch of D.I.’s popped out of the head and made us run to the end of
the hallway. During this time I was feeling really scared, but soon the
scariness went away and it was replaced with anger and hate! That changed later
that night when I was feeling peaceful and relaxed. This was the time they had
us go to bed for the night.
Since I
have been here at boot camp I have had to struggle both mentally and physically.
The first mental pain I had started right when I got up and the DI’s were
yelling at us from the moment we opened our eyes. It was so hard to keep on
saying to myself, don’t quit, keep on going! But the whole time I just wanted to
say, I give up and I am going back to bed! That was the hardest thing that I had
to do mentally and I have done it every day since that time because I realized
that I am in boot camp. The next hardest thing was the schoolwork because I have
not been in school for years before coming to boot camp. I would be sitting in
my room trying to do the work and I would just get so frustrated that I wanted
to quit! That was the most real mental thing that was really hard for me. Now
physical problems, I had a lot of them and it all started on intake day. The
DI’s had us doing so much physical training that my body felt like rubber! I
thought that part was going to be the hardest but I was wrong! First they
started us out running for 10 minutes and that was hard at first. But I started
to get use to doing it. Then they added 5 more minutes and then it got even
harder. That went on for a little bit and when we got up to 30 minutes I felt
like I was going to pass out. After a while we built up to 45 minutes and at
first it was very hard. But soon enough it became easier for me. Plus now they
had us doing pull-ups and running the whole course. The upper body workouts that
they were having us do was just for the fun of it. They like to watch us do all
this hard work. Something I thought I would never see myself doing.
Something I thought I would never see was that sometime into boot camp I saw
they were not doing it for fun but it was for are own good. That is when it quit
being hard and became fun.
Before I
came to boot camp my relationship with my family was real bad. They would tell
me to do something and I would turn around and do the total opposite. I was to
the point that I was steeling from my dad, which now I sit in here and just
think to myself why did I do that. I would not come home for days at a time and
I wouldn’t not care how they were feeling. Since I was put into boot camp, my
relationship with them has become so much better. Before I came here my dad and
me were not even talking to each other. But now we are getting along real good!
Plus for the first time in my life, my dad is proud of me and he tells everyone
how good I am doing. So in a way, I am happy I came to boot camp because it
brought my family and me a lot closer together.
When I
was going to regular school I was one of those kids that went to school just to
hang out with my friends. I never went to school to do learn or do homework. I
would go to sleep in class or I would be the class clown. I am sure that none of
the teachers wanted me there either. So after a while I just stopped going but
soon after that the court system made me go. So now they were stuck with me
(school that is)! Now that I was put into boot camp and I have to go to school
and I am starting to like it. Plus at this point in school I am learning a lot
and I am and A/B student. I have made a big change in from being a bad student
to a real good one. I have made the honor roll and I now have a GPA which I
never had before.
I would
not say that I have a relationship with any of the DI’s because here at boot
camp they are doing their job and I don’t always like the way they do their job.
There are some DI’s that I like here and I think some of them like me to. Since
they have a job to do and I have one to, we can not show it. This could all
change when I am out of boot camp for good. Some of the DI’s I would like to
hang out with and maybe go shoot some pool or go to the park and play some
sports. So when I get out I might have a friendly relationship with some of the
DI’s but while I am in here I look at it like it is just business.
Since I
have come to boot camp, I have made a lot of changes in the way I act and feel.
I have changed the way I talk to people and treat them. The biggest changes I
have would be in the physical part. I am running for 45 minutes with out getting
out of breath and before I came to boot camp I couldn’t even run for 5 minutes
without getting out of breath. Some of the other things are how I treat my
family and how I feel about them. Yes, I have made a lot of changes from being
in boot camp. But I still have a lot to work on. The biggest thing I need to
work on is controlling my anger when people get me mad. I should say when I let
people get me mad. I am still working on the way I think about life and my
purpose here on earth. Also, I need to change how I let people and stupid things
get to me so easily. There is a lot of stuff that I still need to change. I have
done the first part in changing and that is to identify the problems but I still
have a lot to work on.
A vivid
memory that I have from boot camp was a month after I was put in here. It was at
the treatment team meeting to see if I advance to a blue cover or not. I went up
to the blue cover but the best thing was being able to see my mom. Even though I
was not allowed to talk to her, I didn’t care! At least I got to see her and
show her that I was just fine. At first the CIP was not going to let me give her
a hug but at the end he told me to give her a big hug. What I like the most is
that it was the best day at boot camp! That day will be in my head for the rest
of my life!
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my word!
“Boot camp is easy, it’s going back out there that is difficult.”
Wed Jan
23, 2002
I’m
sorry I haven’t kept you up with the news of Rich lately but we have been
extremely busy. The boot camp now has meetings for the parents every other week,
twice a week, and visitations on Saturday as well. Plus Rich coming home on
Sundays keeps us busy.
I also
have had to pick Rich up to take him to doctor appointments for little things
but in the process of doing so you wouldn’t believe the change in him. Rich
addresses everyone he meets (besides kids his age) with Sir, Ma’am, Yes, Sir,
etc. So appropriate and every time he does this which is all the time I get
tears in my eyes. I am so proud of him! He’ll even do it with his dad and me.
Sometimes he’ll even slip and say, “As you were” and I will just start laughing
and so will he. Even last Sunday when his dad was addressing him about
something, Rich replied “I, I Sir.” My heart broke! This is how he is during
every home visit. Upon picking him up Sunday at 12 noon, we go to lunch first
where ever he wants to go and upon taking him back at night he has me leave the
house at 7:15 (he doesn’t have to be back until 8:00pm and it only takes 12
minutes from our house to get back to the boot camp) because he doesn’t want to
be late. So we sit in the parking lot for ½ hour but that’s ok too because it
just gives us more quality time together to discuss all kind of things. Of
course on the ride back (after eating dinner at 6pm at home) he likes to stop at
Wendy’s or Taco Bell to get that extra real food! And boy can he eat fast and a
lot in a short period of time.
I still
attend the treatment team meetings that they have (which is a progress report on
the child) every two weeks. So far at every treatment team meeting they have had
nothing but great things to say about Rich. When I was waiting to go to the
meeting I was in the lobby at the boot camp talking to Lt. Downs who proceeded
to tell me “Well we were warned (by everyone in Juvenile Justice) that this kid
(meaning Rich) was going to be coming to boot camp and he was a tough kid”, that
they would have big problems with him. But he proceeded to state that they
haven’t had any problems with him and he has turned out to be a role model. And
that he hopes that Rich is one of their “success stories!” You couldn’t
image how good that made me feel, let alone, I pray he is one of their success
stories as well.
Also,
Rich now wants to be in the Air Force so we are checking into possibilities for
that. All I can say at this point is that I pray to God that Rich is one of
their success stories and ours as well, stays on the right path and succeeds in
life. Right now, I do believe it is possible. Come March 15th, when
he is released from transition and placed in aftercare, this is where his
greatest challenges of all will begin. Like Lt. Downs said, “boot camp is easy,
it’s going back out there that is difficult.” And he is so right! Because once
again they are faced with those challenges, choices, and peer pressure. It is a
matter of whether they have learned that it is easy to walk away from bad
situations, go talk to someone, get help, remember that they can do anything if
they set their mind to it and stay on the right path and they will succeed in
life!
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my word!
Praise from a Boot Camp Parent
Wed Jan 23,
2002
I have been
emailing you about Rich and his progress at the Pinellas County Boot Camp. But I
think people need to know about the boot camp from the voice of a parent who has
been dealing with them since July 19, 2001.
I
would like to take this time to praise the wonderful people at the
Pinellas County Boot Camp. Their
dedication toward the youths goes unrecognized and by all means they need to
be recognized! I know I can’t name everyone because I don’t know their name
but from the receptionist, secretaries, Lieutenants, Sergeants, Drill
Instructors, Case Managers, Doctors, Corporals and Teachers these are the best
of their profession! We always here about the horror stories from these camps,
JDC, etc., but the individuals that do their job and do it right, go unnoticed.
I am sorry that these are the only names I know (and I am sorry if I get their
ranks wrong) but I want to be sure that they definitely get recognized for their
outstanding quality. Lt. Downs, Corporal Davis, Mr. Szebo, Dr. Ryan, Sergeant
Chalmers, DI Montgomery, DI Picardi, DI Leukenbarry, DI Bibb, Teachers: Ms.
Edwards, Ms. Green, Ms. Hayes, Mr. Huepenbecker and Mr. Klein, DI Prichard, Cpl.
Brotchi, Cpl. Lopez, Cpl. McClendon, Ms. Sullivan, Ms. Tunstall, DI Scavorski
and I am so sorry that I did not mention the others by name because there are
just so many wonderful people at this facility.
For all that
they have done, for everything they stand for, their dedication for the children
of today, tomorrow and the future! You will always be appreciated for the
dedicated work you do day in and day out! You are the tops in our eyes, our
family’s eyes and other parents of youths in the PCBC! I cannot express enough
how wonderful these individuals are. They are always nice, caring and utmost
informative! They love their job and the youths that they are trying to turn
around! These individuals are unbelievable and deserve an award for their
dedication! They might be tough on these youths, shove them around a little bit,
but my GOD if it wasn’t for them my child would be dead or in jail! So I solute
them and everything they stand for! I know it is scary being a parent and
sending your child to a boot camp because I know, and believe me I have cried
more than anyone will ever know but after dealing with the personnel of the PCBC
and seeing the change in my child, I would do it all over again if it meant
saving my child! I’m sure the kids hate it but it is the best thing in the world
for them when there is not other alternative! And if any parent ever had doubts,
regrets, etc., about putting their child into the PCBC or any other boot camp,
DON”T, it would be the best thing you could ever do for yourself, your child,
and the future for your child! If for some reason it doesn’t work for your
child, just remember that it did for a hundred others and at least as a parent
you tried.
The Pinellas County Boot
Camp Team Members Are The Best!
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my word!
"...he made his bed without
being told!"
Sun Feb 24, 2002
Rich came home for his first 24 hour
visit and it was wonderful! He worked on his car until 11pm last night. We
ordered pizza and watched TV. He stayed up until 3:00am watching movies and got
up at 11 today. He woke up and was just so appreciative of how wonderful it was
to be in peace and quite with no one yelling, not having to get up at 5am or go
to bed at 9pm. He loves his bed and can't believe how comfortable it is
(compared to boot camp beds which are like a 3 inch hard plastic mattress on top
of concrete). He was like "go get in my bed and feel how comfortable it is,
isn't it nice." I told him to listen....peace...no noise and no one
yelling....he loved it! He said the only thing he heard last night was two
squirrels getting in a fight, other than that it was so quite. Let alone, this
is the shocker...he made his bed without being told! He said he could do it in
quarter folds like their beds at boot camp but I told him that was ok...plus the
comforter is too big to do that with! LOL Today we went and had his hair buzzed
(not like there was much to buzz) and he talked to the guy cutting his hair with
yes, sir and thank you, sir! It is so nice to see a kid being so polite but on
the other hand I am also seeing another side to adults that don't say thank you
back or appreciate him being polite and respectful, it's sad. I almost want to
tell these people, "Hey, he just said yes, sir... thank you, sir...how about
saying your welcome or something!" No wonder these kids aren't respectful...they
don't get it back from the people that should be respectful!
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my word!
"Boy, are they strict!"
Sun Mar
3, 2002
Well we
went to an aftercare orientation last week. Boy are they strict. And mind
you, this will go on for 4 months. He has to wear a beeper that he will
not know the number to and if they beep him he has 3-5 minutes to call them back
or they will be looking for him. They will even beep him at 2 in the
morning and tell him to come to the door just so they know he is home, if he is
a sound sleeper and doesn't hear his beeper they will be knocking on the door at
2 in the morning. He has to go to school every day, he has to have a job
(if he gets fired that is not good because he could go back to boot camp for a
day) and he can't quit his job unless he has another one, plus he has to do his
community service. He has to attend an AA/Drug meeting once a week (can't
miss or he is in big trouble), they check on him everyday, and may be several
times a day, if we have any problems we are to call them immediately and they
will have a DI at the house pronto! They will come in the house, check his
room to make sure his bed is made and his room is clean, if it isn't then he is
in violation and will have consequences. Then each month they let up a
little. Rich was just home for his first 24 hour home visit this weekend
and a DI showed up at 10pm. I could hear Rich talking to him at the front
door and the DI was so nice to him and sincere...not just some DI that works at
the boot camp checking up on one of these kids. The DI said "How are you
doing? Everything Ok? Are you doing all right? Are you sure?"
And this was coming from his heart, not his job that he has to do. These
people are so wonderful, it brings tears to my eyes because
why.................THEY CARE!
If they
screw up real bad they will start them from day one at boot camp or send them to
another program until they are 18 if they have too! This weekend Rich had to go
job hunting. He ended up filling out 3 applications. One at the SPCA
which they will hire him immediately because the SPCA works with the boot camp
and he would start at 6.00 an hour, plus he went to Publix's and Albertson's.
Which all of these start at 6.00 an hour for any position. Oh, plus he has
to pay his restitution and they will automatically take 60% of his pay check
toward that and the rest is his. Rich's restitution was 1667.74. I
have been paying this and now have it down to 1067.74. But when he gets a
job, he will be paying for it and then have to pay me back as well. And
this is court ordered.
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my word!
Thank you!
Sat Mar 9, 2002
I
would like to thank the following individuals that have touched our
family’s life, gave us encouragement and encouraged our son as well. For
all you have done, for everything you stand for, your dedication that you
put forth in these youths of today, tomorrow and in the future.
You will always be appreciated for the dedicated work you do day in and
day out! You're tops in our book and in our eyes and our family’s eyes!
A special thanks and appreciation to, Lt. Timothy Downs for once saying
to me that Richard is a role model in the program and from what everyone
was telling him prior to my son’s intake, he was going to be big trouble!
You wished him well and told him that he would make it because he has
parents that care!
Mr. Szabo, for putting up with all my phone calls in the beginning of the
program and always reassuring me when times were tough for Richard and
us. And most important, returning my phone calls in a timely fashion and
never getting upset with me, you were always so polite.
To D/I Marc Luginbill and D/I Michael Picardi, whom we saw every weekend
after the first month and thereafter for three months. You were the
first D/I’s that we began to know and you did a great job! You may have
been tough on Richard at times but it was for his best interest and we
thank you for that!
D/I Christopher Bibb, you where the first to come up to me, Richard’s
grandmother and great grandmother and tell us how good Richard was doing.
This was only after 2 months of Richard being in the program. Also, how
you thought he was going to continue to be good and that he will be one
of the success stories, that he’s a good kid.
Cpl. Rodney Davis, the things you said to me gave me the courage and hope
for Richard when he is released. Like you stated, you liked Richard and
thought he was a good kid but in the same respect if he is to do
something negative or inappropriately you will come down on him, that you
are not going to let him slide, it’s for his own good!
Dr. Ryan, for saying wonderful things about Richard during our treatment
team meeting and giving him encouragement as well.
Ms. Tunstall, Sgt. Laura Chalmers, for putting up with my phone calls and
keeping me informed on everything. And Mrs. Sullivan for her informative
transition program insight.
Page 2
To all the wonderful teachers at the PCBC, Brenda Edwards, Delores Green,
Kathie Hayes, Brian Klein for doing such a wonderful job! And Mr.
Huepenbecker who was always giving Richard and myself reassurance that he
will do well. You also spent time talking to me about Richard’s progress
and his education once he left boot camp. You also made it possible for
him to shadow someone at PTEC, which gave him a better outlook on his
education. Thank you.
D/I Attila Sereg, D/I Christine Prichard, D/I Gary Scevola, D/I Ronald
Montgomery, D/I Wade McClendon, Cpl. Jose’ Lopez, D/I Jeffrey Cuttitta,
D/I Gary Lonsbury, D/I Gregory Maldonado, Cpl. Robert Swanson, D/I
Jeffrey Clement, Cpl. Randall Dorr, D/I Thomas Eckert, D/I Brian Leibach,
D/I Edwin Bryant, and Cpl. Russell Novak for encouraging Richard as well.
All of you made an impact on Richard and he wanted me to mention your
names because he really liked all of you.
D/I Johnnie Hale for being so kind to us and stopping by the house to
check on Richard. I heard you at the door with him and questions you
were asking him. The questions came from your heart, (it wasn’t because
you had a job to do) you could tell in your voice that you meant it and
were concerned! I thank you for that. A couple of the other recruits
mothers noticed it as well.
Richard use to tell us some things that would take place while he was in
the program and the one’s that will stay in my mind forever is the
laughter you brought him (when joking was ok), the encouraging words you
would give him (when he was feeling down) and even encouragement when he
was doing good. Actually, Richard has spoke very highly of everyone and
how certain D/I’s were more friendly than others but the one’s that were
is what has Richard believing in himself and he does not want to let any
of you down. He told me that he is going to do good because he has a lot
of people counting on him especially the people at the boot camp.
I will always remember the one’s that told me that “Richard will do good!
He will be one of the success stories! He’s a good kid, I like him!”
When you give these kids the encouragement as I described above that Rich
said, I think that hits home the most and makes these kids want to
succeed because they don’t want to let you down either. It has shown
Rich that you care about him and if you do this with the youths, I think
they appreciate it more than coming from their own parents. I praise
this program so much and everything you do!
Page 3
Taking into consideration everything we have been through with Richard, I
pray that he will be one of the PCBC success stories too!
“Keep Up The Good Work!”
Sincerely,
KW
cc:
Sheriff Everett S. Rice
Timothy Niermann, Manager, Probation
and Community Corrections
The Honorable Judge Peter Ramsberger
Barry Bohnet, DJJ-JPO Supervisor
Jeb Bush, Governor-State of Florida
William Bankhead, Secretary-Florida
Dept. of Juvenile Justice
Bob Graham, Senator-State of Florida
www.justice4kids.org
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my word!
“To Future
Parents Of A Child Being Placed In the PCBC”
Wed
Mar 13, 2002
I
would like to take this time to praise all the wonderful people at the Pinellas
County Boot Camp! The encouragement I have to say to other parents that
have a child or children being placed in the PCBC is to have faith and hope!
The staff is specially trained individuals that put their heart into turning
children around. They may be tough, they may scare the youths, they may
yell a lot, shove them around a little, they may tell you things that you don't
want to hear, but these are the finest individuals that take their career
seriously! Most of all, they care about these kids! So if you are
apprehensive about your child being placed in the PCBC, don't be! You will
be amazed at the outcome! The staff is always pleasant, caring and utmost
informative! They love their job and the youths that they are trying to
turn around! The team of individuals are unbelievable and deserve an award
for their dedication! Most of all, if it wasn’t for them, my child would be dead
or headed for a life behind bars! I know it is scary being a parent to
have your child sent to a boot camp, I know. Believe me… I have cried more
than anyone will ever know. But after dealing with the personnel of the
PCBC and seeing the change in my child, I would do it all over again! I’m
sure these kids hate it, but it is the best thing in the world for them when
there is no other alternative! As a parent, if you have doubts, regrets,
etc., about putting your child into the program, DON’T! It will be the
best thing you could ever do for yourself, your child, and the future of your
child! If for some reason it doesn’t work for your child, just remember
that it did for a hundred/thousands of others and most important knowing as a
parent you tried! These children are not abused in anyway while in this
program; they break them down and build them back up! If anything, they
come out of this program as fine young men. Then it is our responsibility
as a parent to maintain the structure and discipline when they are released.
It becomes a team effort between the child and his family.
Please
remember, that the staff at the PCBC has a job to do whether we agree or
disagree with what they are doing or the way they handle situations.
Remember these individuals are the best in their field and our last bit of hope!
The most important issue of them all is PARENT INVOLVEMENT! Don’t give up
on your child! Support him and show him you care because he will need it
more than anything in the world and especially now! If you don’t, you are
letting your child down and they may not succeed! Best of luck to everyone
involved!
Also,
please visit a web site a friend of mine designed regarding the juvenile justice
system. You will also find my boot camp diary that I published from the
time my son was a part of this program to his release. Go to
www.justice4kids.org then go to My Word, then Boot Camp Diary (the 3rd one down
under contents.)
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my word!
"Now is their time together!"
Sun Apr 14, 2002
Just an update on
Rich. He is doing wonderful! He really likes his job (Thank God!) and is doing
GREAT in school. His case manager stopped by on Wednesday and he is now in level
two of aftercare. His curfew is now 8:30 instead of 8:00 and upon her
interviewing his school and his job, they had nothing but wonderful things to
say about him. So crossing my fingers that after one month of being out of boot
camp he is the most wonderful kid these days! Let alone his room stays clean, he
does his laundry and is paying off his restitution. He says thank you when you
do something for him which he did periodically before boot camp and does not
have the crappy attitude like he did prior to boot camp. He just seems so happy
these days and so are we. He and his dad have this relationship now that I
thought I would never see in my life time! I feel left out now. But after 16
almost 17 years of them hating one another, I don't care if I feel left out. Now
is their time together!
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my word!
The Honeymoon...
Thu 23 May 2002
Well Rich was released from boot camp on March 13, 2002.
What a wonderful day that was to have him home. Sounds weird compared to when he
was getting in all that trouble and I just wanted him put away/gone! The boot
camp assigns the kids to a case manager that checks in on them at home, school
and work. Kathy is Rich's after care case manager and she was also signed to
several other kids. Her work is never done; she works long hours and is
constantly available by phone. It was nice to know that if we had any problems
all we had to do was pick up the phone and Kathy would take care of the rest.
The first month after being released from boot camp is referred to as the
honeymoon stage.
Basically, the kids are just enjoying the life of being
back home, not having to wake up at 5am or going to bed at 9pm. Family life is
wonderful, etc. Fortunately, I never had to do that, thus far (as of May 23,
2002). Rich started back to regular school and was working part-time at SPCA.
Kathy checked in with us several times a week as well to see how things were
going and to update us on Rich as far as school and work. He did great at school
and at his job. They were also required (well the school was required) to
provide progress reports weekly on Rich so we could see how he was doing, etc.
All his progress reports were great and still making honor roll. Rich was
enrolled in SLD classes because that is what he has been enrolled in since
elementary school.
Well, about three weeks into school, he decided it was too
easy and he wanted to be in regular classes and that he wanted a regular diploma
and not a special diploma. Well that shocked me because here was a kid that
hated school, never wanted to go, always made Fs and basically didn't care if he
graduated or not. This worried me even though he was making a wise decision on
his own. My concerns are that he would get fed up once again after all this is
over with and start messing up, etc. But he was very strong about how he wants
to graduate with a regular diploma and was upset that I didn't want him too. I
just figured that he was setting himself up for failure. Well I did what he
wanted because he is a big boy now (17) and all I can do is pray for the best.
Much to my surprise, he is doing GREAT in regular classes, taking Algebra, etc.,
and is still on the honor roll. At 17 years old, I have his report cards on the
frig., as if he was 6 years old again. But in the same aspect, I am showing him
that we are proud of him and to keep it up.
The first month ended without any incidences and Rich
continued to be a great young man that I am very proud of.
Unfortunately, one of the mother's I met at boot camp and
became friends with as well as getting to know her son during those 8 months
didn't do as well. Within the first 3 weeks this kid was on the run! They found
out that he had been lying about going to school, work, AA meetings, etc., and
was back to his old ways as if he was never in boot camp. He lied to this
mother, etc. After a several weeks, he was finally apprehended. He was staying
with another kid all that time. Eventually, the father of this other kid finally
went to his parent's house and wanted to know why their son was staying at his
house all the time and not going to school. Luckily, the man came forward to let
them know what was going on and together they planned a plot to apprehend this
boy. Well it was a success and he was apprehended. He has been in JDC since. He
is suppose to be placed in a high-risk program now which is a lot tougher than
boot camp ever was. As of today, May 23, 2002, they are awaiting a court date to
make it final. He will go into another program for a year. So as you see, they
don't mess around with these kids.
One of the other kids was caught breaking curfew and was
placed in JDC for a weekend and released but had to start his aftercare all over
from day one. Some other boys have made mistakes as well and had curfew times
reduced or given an extension on their release date. If these boys do well
during all three phases of aftercare they can be released from the program one
month early for good behavior. But let it be known that there are several other
boys that are doing great as well, and some even better than that.
Another mother I met and became friends with has a success
story that will bring tears to your eyes. Her son is basically like Rich, so
take it from there. But unfortunately, her family has had a lot of hardship
since her son's release. The father was diagnosed as being in liver failure (I
won't go into details) and became extremely ill and is basically awaiting a
liver transplant. His father was very involved in his son's (stepsons) meetings
while he was in boot camp (one of the few fathers!). His grandmother also passed
away, so this young man was dealing with a lot of serious issues upon his
release. But do you know, instead of turning to drugs as before, this young man
would offer his mother money to help out the family (he wouldn't have done this
before) and the mother didn't accept it so in return (we will call this young
man J so I don't have to keep saying young man) J would go to the store and buy
like $50.00 worth of groceries to help his family out. (The father is no longer
able to work and has lost his benefits through his job). Unfortunately, they had
to apply for financial aid because dad was no longer able to work. But J is
constantly trying to make things work! His mother is so proud of him and
extremely proud of the fine young man he has developed into. J also dropped all
his old friends and is hanging out with honor roll kids, working, going to
school and is just the perfect kid.
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my word!
"I'm so nauseated
today..."
Sun 7 Jul 2002
Ok. I'm ready to throw up all over again. Last night
Rich was to be home at 12. At 12 he called to see if he could stay at
Cody's until 12:30 so we said ok (he sounded ok on the phone and I like Cody).
12:30 no Rich, 12:40 no Rich, I called his cell...where the hell are you...I'm
10 minutes away I'm on my way home....1:00..no Rich...call his cell...Rich get
your ass home right now...I am...let me stay the night at Cody's...No, get home
now!...1:15 no Rich...1:30...call his cell...Where the hell are you and you
better be home now!....I'm 2 minutes away...mom...I had an accident...someone
side swiped my car...I'm like what...Rich...just get home...Now I am standing
out in front of the house. He pulls up...oh, yea...the right front fender
is crushed and the side mirror was ripped off....oh, yea...I'm like...Rich...you
did this...you hit something...I have had my car side swiped before and I know
when it is someone else's fault or your own. He comes inside, his dad just
shakes his head at him, I'm bitching him out, took the car keys from him and
told him the car is taken away and I am taking him off my insurance....his dad
is like, don't even waste your breath on him....he's useless...he's an
asshole...he doesn't care about anything but himself...I'm still bitching about
how he is rehashing boot camp once again, how he respected them and doesn't
respect us, that everything he said was a lie, etc... I went in the room and
couldn't sleep at this point...he of course went to the bathroom and was getting
sick...oh,